Friday, May 9, 2008

Blogger Rejects Offer to Advertise House Built on Toxic Dump

A responsible blogger was recently approached by a real estate firm looking to advertise a house that had been built on top of a toxic dump site.

The firm's owner, Mr. Greed E. Bastard--who indicated in his proposal that he wanted a family with "lots of children" to move in--offered to give the blogger $20K per month to run banner ads promoting the house until it sells.

The banner ad mock-ups featured an anthropomorphized house saying, "Skip the home inspector! The land this house is on used to be an apple orchard!"

"And when we get that baby sold," Bastard wrote in his proposal, "we got a preschool with walls and ceilings coated in dioxin-like polychlorinated Biphenyls and polychlorinated Dibenzodioxins we'd like you to help us get rid of--I mean, sell."

The blogger admitted that a $20K payout each month would be nice, but she knew that there was nothing safe about living in a house sitting on a toxic dump. Through a quick Internet search, she learned that the swath of land beneath the newly built home had been the site of unregulated dumping since the Vietnam War, when Union Carbide manufactured Agent Orange there. The sediment is contaminated with dioxins and other toxic chemicals, as well as lethal levels of arsenic, cadmium, lead, and mercury.

On the heels of Meg Frost's recent betrayal of her readers--and the animals in their care--by promoting Hartz's toxic flea and tick drops, this responsible blogger is being heralded as a bloggerhero.

"I'm no hero," the blogger told reporters at a press conference late Thursday night. "I'm just a decent person."